Why is nursing so darn hard?

I have a great baby. He is so cute and is such a good baby. He is happy and healthy and even sleeps well. But that kid really doesn't seem to care for my breast. I try and try and I just struggle with nursing. I don't know if I just don't hold him correctly or what I am doing wrong but he doesn't want to nurse from me. He nursed pretty good in the hospital, but not for every feeding and not every time I tried. Now that we are home it has only gotten harder.
He had low blood sugar at the hospital so they had to give him a bottle and then with his jaundice we had to give him more bottles so that he was eating more...so needless to say, he likes the bottle. I really don't mind him having a bottle, if he would have me too. That way I would know that he was getting the good stuff and getting enough to eat at the same time. I had a hard time nursing Tyler too, but I really thought that this time would be different. I had a lactation specialist come to my house after I had Tyler, and today I broke down and called her again. I was really glad that I got her help last time, and I hope to have the same results. She is going to come over after her work tomorrow night. I hope that she can help me and that Josh and I can get this whole nursing thing down. Other wise, I might just go crazy.

Baby Joshua is here!

Well it finally happened. Sunday night after we had dinner at Tony's parents house, we decided to go for a little walk to see if that would help start labor. It wasn't much of a walk because we had to stop at a couple of peoples houses, but after we got back I noticed that my lower back was starting to hurt, but I thought maybe it was just gas or something. 

So I got Tyler ready for bed and sat with him for a while and then decided that I would just go to bed. It was only 9:00, but I was pretty tired. My back was still hurting and I was trying to decide if I was having contractions or not. I kept thinking all night about all the things that I still needed to do before I had the baby and made plans for all the things that I would get done the next day to be prepared. I kept getting up to go to the bathroom thinking that that might make my back stop hurting. It didn't work. At about 4:00 am I had just gotten back to bed from going to the bathroom and then I felt a kind of pop "down there." Then I felt a little wet, so I went back to the bathroom and my bottoms were really wet. So I knew then that my water had definitely broken. So I texted Tony, who was already at work, and then started getting packed.

I didn't hear back right away from Tony, so then I called him. I got his voice mail and left him a message. Then I tried to call Tony's mom, but she didn't answer. So then Tony called me and said that he was on his way home and then he called his dad's phone and let them know that we would be coming by soon to drop off Tyler. 

We then finished getting packed and got Tyler in the car and headed to the hospital. Tyler was excited and said that he wanted to go "fast" and it was way cute. I was having some pretty strong contractions and half way there I threw up...so much fun. Luckily I had a barf bag in my car, so it wasn't too bad.

So after we dropped off Tyler we headed straight to the IMC hospital. We got there and checked in and then they got us our room and got down to business. They checked me and I was dilated to a 6 and 90% effaced. They started my IV and we were on our way. I tested positive for the strep B, so they had to give me an antibiotic and have it in for at least four hours before I had baby.

I was there for about an hour when we decided to get the epidural. The contractions were getting really strong and I didn't know if I would dilate quickly and didn't want to wait too long. After the epidural my contractions slowed way down and I stopped progressing. So after another hour or so my midwife gave me patosen to give me stronger contractions. I started pushing at about 11:00 am and Joshua Clark Steenblik was born at 12:37 pm. He was 8 pounds even and was 20 and 1/2 inches long. He was nice and healthy and happy to be here.

Tyler loves his little brother and does pretty good with him. He is doing some funny things to make sure that we still are giving him lots of attention, so that is kind of annoying when it is naughty things. We all have lots of learning to do.

Me and baby are doing well. We are both learning to nurse and what we are doing, but it is ALL GOOD. We are SO SO blessed and happy to have baby home with us.

Still kickin'

Tony has been working nights this past week. It is my least favorite of his schedules. Even though he is here in the mornings, it just feels like we don't see him much during the week. Since Monday is Labor Day, Tony has the day off, but because the dairy is closed he had to go into work today for 12 hours to dry the milk that they would have used on Monday. So it will be nice to have him home on Monday, but sad day today. Tyler and I are going to take him some dinner tonight, so that should be fun to go and see him for a little while.
I had my 38 week appointment yesterday. Everything is looking good. I am dilated to a 3 plus and 70% effaced. So that is exciting that I am progressing. I am still having contractions, so it will be interesting to see when I have this baby. I have been washing baby cloths today and getting the crib ready. We are getting very excited to have this baby come out and meet us.
After my appointment I went to lunch with a couple friends from my ward. They are so nice to me. They treated me to lunch and got me a couple presents for Joshua. We had a really good time and I think that we really need to do that more often.
Last night my parents block had a block party dinner and so we went and it was lots of fun. Tony took Tyler and Hayden (my nephew) to Murray and watched some of the football game and he really liked that and playing around on the practice field. Tony is such a good dad to take Tyler to see and do such fun things all the time. We sure are lucky to have him.

37 weeks tomorrow

I had an appointment today with my midwife. Everything is looking pretty good. It appears that he has dropped just a little bit and I am still dilated to a one and now 50% effaced. I talked to her about my concerns of having a big baby today. Both my sisters have had big babies (over 9 pounds) and even though Tyler was only 7 and change, it is still a concern that I have. So we talked about how long she would let me go before she would induce me, and we have planned for September 23rd to be induced if I haven't had the baby before that. I feel really good about that date and I am happy and relieved that I talked to her about that today. I don't want or expect that she would induce me before my due date -- honestly it bothers me when women are induced before their due date for selfish reasons, health reasons are different. So I now have a for sure end date in site. I do hope that I go into labor on my own this time before that date, but have no problems with being induced.
Tomorrow Tony's grandpa is getting married in the temple to his new bride. He is like 82 and she is 65 and never been married. They are getting sealed in the SLC temple and Elder Hale is going to marry them. I am really excited to be in the same room as one of the apostles and to hear his council to this older couple. It will be way fun and I am really exited that we get to go. My mom is going to watch Tyler while we are at the temple (THANKS MOM) and then we are going to go and check into our hotel. Tony and I are going to stay a couple nights at one of the Hampton Inn's for a little down time before this baby comes. We are going to take Tyler with us at first to go swimming and then we are going to leave him with Tony's mom at the reception that night (THANKS MARGIE). Then she will have Tyler for the next couple nights and we will get him on Sunday. We don't really have plans so it will be nice to just do whatever we want and have it just be Tony and me. I can't wait, what a fun weekend we have a head of our selves.

Doctors and more doctors

This last week I had three different doctors appointments. It all started on Wednesday with my semi-annual dental check up and cleaning. Not too bad, no cavities found, so that is really good. It is always nice to get your teeth cleaned.
Then on Friday I had my 36 week appointment with my midwife. Everything seems to be good there. I gained one pound, all my numbers look good and I have started to dilate, just to a one so far - but it is still early. My next appointment is on Thursday. I am not sure if I will have her check me then or wait for two weeks? I like to find out if I am progressing, but it kind of hurt last time and so I might want to wait. I guess we will see how bad I want to find out if I am progressing.
Then later on Friday I had my annual ear doctor visit. I have to see him at least once a year to make sure that the tube in my ear is still there and doing its job. I also needed a new ear plug. Tyler likes to play with mine and now it doesn't work as well as it should. So I got fitted for a new ear plug and my doc says my ear looks really good. So that is really good that I don't have to worry about getting surgery for at least another year, unless it comes out before that.
We watched our friends from our wards little baby today. She is just a tiny 5 month old baby. So so cute. It was a nice eye opener as to how Tyler might behave once the baby is here. He needs to learn to be softer and more careful with his toys and him self. He didn't do anything to this baby, but he wasn't as precious as I thought that he should be. He made me think, "what was I thinking?" This is going to be harder then I thought, having another baby. I am going to learn a lot. Lucky me. It will be great. I am sure hard at first, but great all together.

35 Weeks and counting

Well I am now 35 weeks a long. So very exciting. Still seems like I have a long time to go, but I know that it will go by quickly and I will wish that I had these days back. In general I feel pretty good, mostly tired. I know that I will be way more tired when the baby comes so I am trying to get as much good sleep as I can. That is just hard to do when you have to pee every hour and then my cute little alarm clock (Tyler) doesn't let me sleep in much. Tony is really good to me and if Tyler does wake in the night, he always checks on him for me so that I can sleep more. I am still having contractions every now and again. Sometimes it is pretty intense, but other times I just feel pressure. Totally weird and crazy. I do feel really big (as shown in the above picture). I am definitely bigger with this baby then I was with Tyler. Once he drops then I am sure that I won't stick out so much. I guess we will see.

Tyler has been so much fun lately -- okay he's always fun. He has been really into fishing and golfing. We bought him a plastic golf set that he really liked, but then ended up breaking two of the clubs. So then Tony found him a used real golf club that is made for kids his size and he really likes that. I was glad he found it for like $6 because a new set of little kid clubs are like $80 - and that is just nuts. It is a little scary at times because it is real, so the end is metal and I worry that he will hurt something, or someone with it. So far he has been really good hitting it the way he should and keeping it low. The picture is of Tyler sitting on our back porch with one of his golf clubs watching Daddy. It is so cute how he wants to be just like his daddy. Tony found some clubs at the DI for him to play with, so him and Tyler have fun hitting the balls in the back yard. I generally sit on the swing and play caddy for the boys, its hard work but someone has to do it.

I wanna go too....

I can't believe that it is already August. July went by pretty quick. I am about 6 weeks away from my due date. It seems like it is really far away, but I know that it is not. We don't have any plans or vacations coming up, so I think that is why I think that September seem so far away. Having the baby is the next big thing that we are looking forward to. Tony and I have talked about maybe getting a hotel for a couple days at the end of the month and having a little us time before this baby comes. So that would be fun. Tony's mom said that she would watch Tyler for the weekend so that we could do that. She is so good to us.
My family leaves to go to Oregon this weekend for the annual family reunion that they have there every year. We haven't been able to go since Tony and I have been married because between the two of us we either always had school or we could afford to go. This year we were totally planning on going, but then we Tony went to get the time off of work, other people had already requested the time off. So this year we aren't going because Tony couldn't get the time off (and it is cutting it close with the whole baby thing)...bummer. THEN, Tony's family is all going to California the week after that to go to Disneyland and since it is within a month of my due date, we can't go to that either. And I didn't think that would be such a good idea to be 8 months pregnant and walk around hot Disneyland for a couple of days. So sad, I could use a vacation.
I am a little bummed that everyone else is going on vacation and we aren't going any where. Tony's mom is going to take us to Disneyland in March, so we are really looking forward to that. It will be lots of fun. We will really need some time off by then.
So I have been having some pretty intense braxton hicks contractions lately. I never felt any contractions at all when I had Tyler until I was induced. So this is very different for me. I am mainly getting them in the evenings and it is just so different. I guess it is a good reason to slow down and rest. Yesterday I though my tummy was going to burst it was so tight. It is a pretty weird feeling. This baby is getting anxious to come out, but aren't we all.

Family, family, family

We just got back from Tony's annual family camp out. We went on Friday to Palisades State Park and camped out there until this afternoon. But before that Wendy and her family came for a visit on Tuesday. So Tyler and I got to spend some fun times with them and the rest of my family earlier in the week.
Tony had to work the night shift this week and he spent his mornings putting a new roof on our garage. He had a couple of the ward boys who came and helped him and we helped pay their way to football camp. In the end, I am sure that we got the better end of the deal. It was a really hot week and it took a little longer then we thought it would. But by Friday, they got most of it done and it looks really good.

Tuesday, after work, I went to my mom's and met up with the rest of my family. All the kids played nice together and all of us siblings and our parents were all there chatting. It was really nice being all together in one room. We ate some dinner and hung out, it was really fun. Most of them then went up to the cabin to spend a couple days, while Tyler and I went home. On Wednesday afternoon Tyler and I headed up there for dinner and four wheeling with the family. It was really nice up there and we had a good time. I wish that Tony could have come, but a man's gotta work.

Thursday I had my Midwife's appointment in the morning. She had to rush the appointment because she had a lady in labor, but everything looks good so far. I am starting my every two week appointments now and that is really exciting, scary, but exciting. Later that day Tyler and I went back to my parents and we went swimming and ate dinner. All the kids seem to really play well together, so it works nice.
Since we were leaving Friday for the camp out, I decided to have my family over to my house for breakfast. It was nice having them here and doing some fireworks together. It went by way too quickly and I can't wait to see them all again.

THEN...we backed up the car and headed to Palisades. We got there and set up our tent and got our things settled and then just hung out. Tyler LOVED the water and wanted to "fish" all the time. We couldn't keep him away from the water. He mostly just loved to throw rooks in the water and take a stick and pretend to fish. We did end up buying him a kids fishing pole and he seemed to like that. He didn't really get casting or any real fishing techniques, but he liked to pretend. Tony and I went on a fun four wheeling ride with his uncle and we went on some fun trails. Tyler played with the kids and with all the sporting things, he had a good time.

Saturday evening they played Horse Shoes and Tyler loved being just like them and playing with the play shoes. He played during three games of adult horse shoes and had a great time. I wish that I would have taken pictures, but I didn't think about it at the time.

Sunday we got up and went to church, where the power went out after the first 10 minutes. But they still went on and it got so hot in the chapel. I ended up sitting out side and Tyler thought with the lights out that it was play time. Silly kid. So Tony and I didn't get much out of church today, but we did get the sacrament, which is most important. I was not feeling very good so I went back a laid in the tent for a while, and then we packed up the tent and our stuff and headed home. All in all it was lots of fun and I think that we all had a good time.

Fun times at the cabin

We decided to go up to the cabin on Friday morning. We stopped at the Outlets in Park City to see if the Crocs store had any good sales. I got some flip flops for $15, so that was good. We also found a couple things for Tyler and the baby on the way. Then we picked up some lunch and headed up to the cabin. Tyler wanted to play once we got there, but we wanted him to take his nap. We finally won that battle, but it took a while. While he was napping I decided to play me a little Dr. Mario. I am not really into video games, but that one is my favorite. I got to level 19 and then died. So sad.
Julie and her two kids came up after Tyler's nap and that made it lots of fun. Tony made some yummy steak and potatoes for dinner and then after Tony, Tyler, Averee and I went on a nice long four-wheeler ride. Averee started falling asleep on the ride, so we decided we had to head back to the cabin. They went back home soon after that.
It took a while, but we finally got Tyler to settle down in the bed room, but he didn't actually go to sleep until after 10:30. Something about sleeping some where else, Tyler just didn't sleep very well. The next morning we made some breakfast and then went for another long ride before we headed home. All and all it was a really nice trip. We love going four wheeling and I love seeing and hearing Tyler's excitement when we go. He likes it the most when we go fast, typical boy.
Then we have been just hanging around the house and doing stuff here. It is nice to all be home and spending time with each other. Good times.

Happy Independence Day

I love the 4th of July! It is just such a fun time a year. My family always gets together and celebrates in style. This year was no different. Since a lot of us went to the Stadium of Fire at BYU on Saturday, we decided to get together and do fire works at my parents house on Friday night. My sisters and I went and get pedicures on Friday afternoon and then after Tony, Tyler, and I got to go to dinner with Tony's grandparents. They live in St. George and wanted to come up and take all of their grandchildren out to dinner. It was really nice spending time with them and enjoying a yummy meal. They have always been so sweet and welcoming to me, they are the bestest.

After dinner and spending some time with Nana and Papa, we went back to my parents for the fire works. I always like to do the "Snakes" and then I handed out the "Poppers" to all the kids. They enjoyed popping them on everything. Then we got out the real fire works and chairs and got the party started. Tyler really loves fire works and did really good watching them. He even asked for more when it was all done.

The next morning we got up early and went to my parents to walk over to the Murray Parade. My dad goes early and sets up the chairs for all of us and then he also takes his PA system and announces the parade. It makes it that much more fun. They had a lot of entries this year. Tyler really loved it until about entry #75 out of #100. Then he was ready to go. They throw lots of candy and that was fun for all the kids to collect the treats.

After the parade, we went back to my parents and hung out for a while before we started the BBQ. We had a lot of family in town, so that made the BBQ lot of fun. It is always nice to see family that you haven't seen in a while. After a long morning and afternoon, we took Tyler home and put him to bed. Then later that day, we got ready and headed down to BYU for the Stadium of Fire. It was lots of fun. Tyler had a really good time dancing to the music and watching the fire works display. I was concerned that it would be too loud and he might not like it, but he did really great. He let me cover his ears through the really loud stuff, so I was really glad about that. It was a fun, but late night. Thanks to Sherri for giving us the tickets and for sitting by us. We really did have a good time.

My extended family was in town as well this weekend because my cousin Vikki blessed her baby today. Brandy, Ryan, and her four boys stayed at our house again. It is always fun to have them stay with us. Brandy and I could talk forever. I went to the blessing with my sister Julie, and my cousin Robin. It was nice. The church was hot and the kids were all crazy, but it was a good time. After we went and had a nice lunch in, it was hot there too. Really I am always hot, so no big shocker there.

I am so grateful to live in this country. We are so lucky to have our freedoms and privileged that we have. I love that I get to go to church and stand and sing the Nation Anthem. I always get emotional when I sing it, and it is awesome. I just hope that we can keep some of these freedoms that we enjoy so much. It is a little scary what might happen in the future and scary to think where our government might take us. Lets just pray that Heavenly Father will continue to bless us.